10 Signs You Should Stay Away From Someone.

At times, the warnings advising you to keep your distance from someone are blatantly obvious. Certain individuals exude such a toxic aura that it's hard to miss.

Nevertheless, there are instances when these indicators are more subtle. People with subtler toxic traits can inflict a considerable emotional toll on us. They may wear the facade of friendship while simultaneously undermining us behind the scenes.

They possess the art of drawing you close and then abruptly pushing you away, all the while making you feel culpable for their shifts in behavior towards you. 

It's common to sense that something is amiss, but soon they'll lure you back in, causing you to momentarily forget your earlier apprehensions. This is precisely why identifying these signs can often be perplexing.

Yet, if you attentively observe and recognize the convergence of several of these indicators, it becomes evident that it's time to distance yourself from that person.

1. The skillful exploiter.

Certain individuals possess a remarkable ability to discern your vulnerabilities and exploit them for their benefit.

For example, if they become aware of your gentle nature, susceptibility to persuasion, or difficulty in refusing others, they will approach you whenever they require something. They adopt a pitiable demeanor because they understand that it diminishes the likelihood of your refusal.

To identify such individuals, first, assess their interactions with others. Are they typically outspoken or confrontational but suddenly adopt a gentler persona solely when they require something from you? If it seems that the amiability they display towards you is a calculated effort aimed at manipulation and persuasion, then it likely is.

Secondly, observe their reactions when your response is unfavorable to their requests. Do they appear offended or disheartened? Do they treat your non-compliance as an affront in itself? If so, you are likely dealing with someone from whom it would be wise to maintain a distance.

2. The emotional vampire. 

Life can present its challenges, and there are moments when we yearn for a compassionate listener to confide in. However, a genuine friend comprehends the importance of not perpetually casting blame on others for sharing their burdens.

They may seek your support to express the hardships and injustices they've endured, yet they become impatient if you endeavor to share your own concerns even in moderation. These individuals tend to leave you emotionally drained after each interaction, and here's why.

You'll find yourself repeatedly attempting to rescue them, offering well-intentioned advice that they often disregard. Their primary objective isn't personal growth; instead, they seek your sympathy. 

The reason behind this behavior is relatively straightforward. Constantly complaining about life provides them with a means to validate their misery. Regrettably, they may fail to recognize the detrimental impact of their negative energy on your well-being.

3. The insatiable taker.

Genuine affection towards someone typically manifests through acts of kindness, whether it involves spending on them or offering assistance in various ways. 

This inclination exists irrespective of gender or the nature of the relationship, be it intimate or platonic. There is a natural desire to do something special for the person in your life.

Nevertheless, there are individuals who may assert their care for you but primarily seek to receive from you. They hold a sense of entitlement when it comes to your resources, often failing to exhibit even a hint of gratitude. Such people can be found within your circle of friends, family, or colleagues.

Exploitative individuals have a singular objective: to utilize others. They operate without a sense of moral conscience and remain indifferent to the emotional impact on their victims once their purposes are served. Their interest does not extend to your personal growth, and they make no effort to contribute positively to your well-being.

4. The holy backstabber.

When an individual consistently finds flaws in others, it serves as a significant warning sign. They engage in conversations critiquing the behavior of those around them while remaining oblivious to, or unwilling to admit, their own mistakes.

These individuals tend to project their own shortcomings onto others. What's important to understand is that those who enjoy disparaging others in front of you are likely to engage in similar behavior when speaking about you to different people. 

Why is this the case? It's essentially a game to them, and in this game, they are the central focus. The well-being of others or the damage to someone's reputation holds little importance. Their primary satisfaction lies in portraying themselves as faultless, emerging in a favorable light.

Avoid falling for the facade of moral superiority that such individuals often adopt. If someone consistently indulges in gossip and backstabbing, it's a clear indicator that you should steer clear of their influence.

5. Emotional instability. 

Spending time with an emotionally unstable individual can be quite challenging. Predicting what might upset them becomes an ongoing task. You often find yourself second-guessing whether the harmless joke you're about to share will inadvertently offend them.

For instance, an emotionally unstable person might suddenly become jealous if you're spending time with your significant other while they're currently without theirs.

In essence, if you have a friend who frequently experiences unpredictable mood swings without an apparent trigger, you may be dealing with an emotionally unstable individual. In such cases, it's advisable to maintain some distance. Why? The inconsistency in their behavior towards you will likely lead to ongoing frustration and confusion.

6. Neediness.

Initially, individuals with a strong need for validation can be quite captivating. In fact, their neediness can even accelerate the process of forming a connection with them. But why does this happen?

The desire to feel important is a universal sentiment. Having someone consistently seeking your company, offering compliments, and unquestioningly supporting your decisions can be rather appealing. It fosters a sense of superiority and provides a comforting feeling of security.

Nonetheless, the charm of needy individuals can wear thin rather quickly. Over time, you'll come to realize that their dependence on you doesn't stem from any particular skills or attributes you possess. Instead, their attachment is driven by a deep-seated fear of being alone.

They'll seek your approval for virtually every action they take. As fantastic as this type of relationship may seem initially, it can soon take a strange turn. 

Needy individuals can become exasperating when you recognize that they insist on sticking with you at all times. In certain instances, they may even experience jealousy when you attempt to make new friends or enjoy yourself independently of them.

7. You feel bad about yourself when you’re together.

A true friend has the ability to bring out your finest qualities, emphasizing your strengths while overlooking your weaknesses.

However, there are individuals who seem determined to make you feel unhappy for no apparent reason. These individuals exclusively focus on your errors, incessantly pointing out your shortcomings. They engage in unfavorable comparisons, causing you to doubt your abilities and seldom, if ever, acknowledge your achievements.

People of this nature are primarily interested in sapping your emotional well-being. It's possible that you remind them of something they dislike or that you, as the saying goes, "may stir up the demons within them."

Whatever the underlying cause may be, it is advisable to distance yourself from anyone who seems intent on causing you distress intentionally.

8. Erratic behavior.

Have you ever experienced having a friend who appears wonderfully pleasant, friendly, and caring one day, only to exhibit a completely different demeanor the next? Such individuals tend to be highly unpredictable, capable of showing affection one moment and withdrawing it the next.

They struggle with maintaining a consistent attitude, oscillating between moments of trustworthiness and reliability, where you envision a long-lasting friendship, and instances when they make you feel as though you're no longer a part of their life. 

Interactions with these individuals can be perplexing, making it challenging to determine whether they genuinely consider you a friend or not.

9. Disregard your boundaries. 

Have you ever encountered a friend who takes pleasure in engaging in activities they're well aware you disapprove of?

Friendships are ideally constructed upon mutual understanding. In such relationships, occasional misunderstandings occur, and they are typically resolved through communication, with both parties striving to avoid repeating past mistakes.

Mistakes are indeed inevitable, but if you have a friend who continually returns to actions they know you dislike, or worse, employs these actions to cause you harm, it's advisable to distance yourself from such an individual.

Their actions aren't driven by mere forgetfulness; they intentionally engage in these behaviors to elicit a reaction from you, deriving enjoyment from doing so. In essence, they fail to respect the boundaries you've set.

For example, if you've cautioned a friend multiple times about speaking negatively regarding your mother, yet they persist in doing so, it becomes evident that this individual derives satisfaction from placing you in an uncomfortable position.

10. Bad influence.

These individuals are determined not to be left behind. Even if they can't surpass your achievements, they strive to remain on equal footing with you.

They consistently devise methods to hinder your progress, often doing so precisely when you're making a conscious effort to improve yourself.

As the adage goes, "20 children can't play for 20 years." When you identify someone of this nature, it's prudent to sever ties promptly. 

In the words of Jordan Peterson, as explained in his book "12 Rules for Life," when you endeavor to advance, you pose a threat to those who find themselves at a similar level as you. Your actions implicitly challenge the validity of their mediocrity.

Conclusion.

Occasionally, we lack the ability to choose our companions; moreover, we seldom possess immediate insight into an individual's true character. It necessitates time to gain a comprehensive understanding of someone's genuine nature and the potential influence they may exert over our lives.

However, when the influence they yield proves detrimental, it is imperative to take swift action and distance yourself. Toxic individuals can profoundly affect you emotionally, and it is inadvisable to either endure their presence or attempt to manage their behavior.