How To Be A Good Boyfriend: 10 Ways To Do It Right.

Becoming the ideal partner in a relationship often involves surprising strategies. For instance, when striving to capture your partner's attention, you might unintentionally come across as overly eager. 

While you believe that showering them with attention demonstrates your care, it may unexpectedly lead them to feel overwhelmed.

In the initial stages of any relationship, aspects like attraction, intimacy, respect, excitement, and romance come naturally. But how can you maintain these qualities over time?

Sustaining the spark in a relationship often requires purposefully engaging in specific actions, at specific times, in specific ways. This doesn't mean you should turn into a mechanical presence, obsessing over every move you make. 

Rather, it entails a conscious effort to shape and refine your role as the man in the relationship.

With that in mind, here are 10 recommendations to foster a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

1. Create the right relationship dynamic.

The relationship dynamic you establish can significantly impact the success of your relationship. Wondering how?

When you approach your relationship with insecurity, it can unintentionally push your partner away. For example, a man may fear rejection to the extent that he allows his partner to dictate terms, avoiding expressing differing opinions to avoid displeasing her.

Conversely, the fear of being abandoned can lead a man to become overly controlling. He may succumb to jealousy due to his lack of self-assurance, bombarding his partner with unnecessary inquiries about her every move.

These scenarios manifest at various levels and rarely yield positive outcomes. Eventually, the woman may leave the relationship due to boredom or frustration.

The key is to establish the right dynamic. To be an exceptional partner, approach your relationship with confidence and fearlessness.

Believe in your self-worth. If you genuinely embrace this belief, your natural confidence will emerge, eliminating any reason for her to consider leaving you. Your self-assurance will shine through your personality, leading her to appreciate you even more.

2. Learn to play along with her drama.

Women can sometimes exhibit a penchant for drama. To have an enjoyable time with them as a man, it's crucial to develop the ability to handle their dramatic moments. 

For instance, when your partner begins to express concerns about something that you might consider trivial, like choosing a place to eat or fretting about attending an event due to a hairstyling issue, reacting with anger isn't the most suitable response.

Resist the urge to get entangled in the drama. Instead, if feasible, try to inject some humor into the situation. Many men tend to get ensnared in drama swiftly, taking it as a personal affront. Responding with laughter demonstrates emotional maturity and self-control.

3. Communicate with her.

The primary reason behind 65% of divorces is inadequate communication, and this is hardly surprising. Silence tends to foster disorder and uncertainty.

In contrast, words have the power to dispel this chaos. People generally prefer not to grapple with the challenge of deciphering your unspoken thoughts, as it can create discomfort.

A clear sign of maturity lies in recognizing that not everyone possesses the ability to fathom your innermost thoughts. Consequently, a significant aspect of excelling as a boyfriend involves effectively expressing your emotions.

Effective communication serves to illuminate and enhance our roles within a relationship. It brings forth a sense of comfort, security, and confidence.

4. Show you care, without saying it.

While verbalizing sentiments like "I care about you" or "I love you" is wonderful, demonstrating your affection through actions carries significantly more impact. 

Inquire about her ongoing projects, express genuine interest in her day, and truly engage with her when she speaks. These seemingly small gestures can, over time, nurture a deeper emotional connection than mere words ever could.

5. When you think she did something great, tell her. 

There's nothing quite as pleasing as receiving a heartfelt compliment from someone whose opinion holds significance for you. Why is this the case?

Well, we all grapple with occasional self-doubt about our abilities. Therefore, the impact of a well-deserved compliment cannot be overstated.

Nonetheless, this doesn't imply that you should shower her with constant praise. Instead, consider it this way: everyone benefits from encouragement. It's astonishing how even a small amount of encouragement can empower people to achieve remarkable things.

Consequently, offering genuine compliments when she accomplishes something noteworthy positions you as a crucial presence in her life. It conveys your belief in her, transforming you into someone she can rely on and derive strength from.

6. Don’t treat sex as a privilege you get from her.

It's a fundamental aspect of human psychology that an excess of something diminishes its perceived value.

Many men tend to view sex as a kind of privilege granted by their girlfriend. For instance, if your girlfriend initiates sex after an unplanned night out, it's important not to react with a mindset of, "Wow, I'm so fortunate to get this tonight."

Avoid behaving as though you're lucky to have sex with your girlfriend, as such an attitude can harm your relationship in the long term. Instead, strive to establish a dynamic where both of you eagerly anticipate intimate moments.

Encourage her desire for intimacy because it's a crucial factor in her enjoyment. It's a matter of psychology.

A considerate boyfriend comprehends that sex is not about taking something from your girlfriend; it's about sharing love and connection mutually.

7. Create novelty. 

In the early stages of a relationship, excitement naturally thrives. However, as time passes, a sense of routine brought about by familiarity often sets in.

Here's a common scenario that unfolds in many relationships:

A couple begins their journey with enthusiasm, but after several months or years, the relationship can start to feel monotonous.

In an effort to reignite the spark, the man sometimes resorts to playing hard to get, attempting to regain the girl's attention. However, this approach can inadvertently portray him as needy rather than caring.

As Robert Greene articulated in "The Art of Seduction":

"Your greatest power in seduction is your ability to turn away, to make others come after you, delaying their satisfaction."

Novelty doesn't spontaneously emerge; it must be consciously cultivated. It's essential to occasionally take a step back, focus on important aspects of life, and let the anticipation build. The key here is to make your partner desire more of your presence, not less.

8. Don’t kill her trust in you.

We often confide sensitive aspects of ourselves with those we hold dear, motivated by the desire to demonstrate our trust and reliance on them. However, at times, some men breach this trust, inadvertently causing harm. How does this happen?

During intense arguments, they sometimes weaponize the sensitive information their partner has shared with them. For instance, if she had previously confided in you about her past feelings of depression when her previous relationship ended, labeling her as an insecure person in the heat of an argument constitutes a betrayal of trust.

It's important to learn how to handle the personal secrets your partner entrusts to you with care. Using such information against her will severely damage her trust in you.

9. Continuously put in the effort to spice up your relationship.

In Rule 10 of Jordan Peterson's book "Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life," it is stated:

"Devote careful planning and persistent effort to maintain the romantic spark in your relationship."

The sobering reality is this: Regardless of how physically attractive or alluring a couple may be, the initial excitement in any relationship is bound to wane over time.

Wondering why? Familiarity has a tendency to dampen people's enthusiasm. But there's a way to counteract this natural decline.

The sole antidote to the gradual erosion of passion is to proactively invest effort into revitalizing your relationship. It's vital not to fall into the trap of thinking, "I already have her, so I'm doing great." Relationships break down all too often.

If you aspire to be a great boyfriend, you must grasp the art of infusing novelty. Surprise her occasionally, create moments of anticipation, and take time for getaways.

10. Show her off.

Make it clear to your partner that you take pride in having her in your life.

When you express your love for her yet refrain from holding her hand in public, it might lead to doubts about her role in the relationship.

Boldly introduce her to your friends during social gatherings and occasionally share pictures of her. This demonstrates her significance to you, indicating that you value her and take the relationship seriously.

While not everyone may be inclined towards public displays of affection, it's essential to actively brainstorm ways to show that you're unashamed of having her by your side.

Final Thoughts. 

In Robert Greene's words from "The Art of Seduction":

"There is an insufficiency of mystery in the world; too many individuals express their feelings and desires explicitly."

This implies that the process of seduction, or nurturing a wonderful relationship, doesn't occur by happenstance. It necessitates more than simply doing or saying whatever comes to mind; instead, it mandates conscientious effort and creative thinking to preserve the allure and enchantment within your relationship.